by Fulden Tubb
Letting go—it sounds simple, but for many, it's one of life’s hardest challenges. Whether it’s clinging to past mistakes, toxic relationships, or outdated beliefs, the weight of holding on can slow you down, draining your energy and happiness. But what if I told you that letting go isn’t about loss? It’s about creating space—for new opportunities, for emotional freedom, for a lighter, more fulfilling life.
In this article, we’ll explore why letting go is so difficult, the profound impact it can have on your life, and some unconventional strategies to help you get started. Along the way, we’ll share activities for you to try and questions to ask yourself as you begin this journey.
Why Letting Go is So Difficult
Letting go isn’t just about releasing emotions; it’s about confronting the mental and emotional baggage that we carry around. But why do we cling to things that hurt us? Imagine holding onto a rope that’s burning your hands, but you don’t let go because the rope has become familiar. The things we hold onto often serve as a form of security—even when they cause pain—because they’re familiar, and the familiar feels safe.
Holding on is like carrying an old suitcase that’s heavy and full of stuff you no longer need. You drag it around with you, but the thought of dropping it feels impossible because you’ve been carrying it for so long. This could be a grudge, a belief, or even a fear of failure. We convince ourselves that if we let go, we lose part of our identity.
But what if, instead of losing something, letting go creates more space for growth? What if that suitcase, once emptied, could be filled with things that actually serve us—like joy, love, or peace?
The Impact of Letting Go
When you finally let go of that emotional baggage, it creates ripples across all areas of your life—mentally, emotionally, and even physically.
Mental Clarity: Letting go frees up mental space, allowing you to think more clearly. Think of your mind as a cluttered attic. As you clear out the old junk—negative thoughts, past regrets—you make room for new, healthier ideas and opportunities. Your ability to make decisions improves, anxiety decreases, and you begin to see life with more optimism.
Emotional Healing: Emotionally, letting go opens you up to healing. When you release anger, resentment, or sadness, it’s like wiping a fogged-up window clean. You start to see life more clearly, and others can see the real you. Your relationships improve because you’re no longer projecting unresolved emotions onto those around you.
Physical Well-being: Stress and unresolved emotions can manifest in physical tension, headaches, or even chronic illnesses. By letting go, you allow your body to relax and heal. Imagine your body as a musical instrument; when it’s out of tune due to stress, it can’t perform at its best. But when you release those tensions, your body starts to function harmoniously.
Try this: Write down the things you’ve been holding onto. What do they cost you—mentally, emotionally, and physically? Are they worth the price?
Unconventional Strategies for Letting Go
While the idea of letting go is clear, the process itself can feel elusive. So instead of relying on the usual advice, let’s dive into some unconventional strategies that can help you loosen your grip on what no longer serves you.
The Power of Distraction: Sometimes, trying too hard to let go keeps you stuck. The more you think about something, the more it holds onto you—like that catchy song that won’t leave your head. Instead, try immersing yourself in a new skill or hobby, like learning a language or an instrument. By redirecting your focus, you’ll give your mind a break, and when you return, those persistent thoughts will often have lost their grip.
Movement as Release: Physical movement can help you release emotional tension stored in the body. Dancing, yoga, or even a simple walk can be surprisingly powerful. Think of your body as a storage unit for emotions. By moving, you’re shaking them loose. Dance without judgement, or take a walk and feel your emotions lighten with each step. Sometimes, the body knows how to release what the mind cannot.
Flip the ‘What If’: Fear of the unknown often keeps us clinging to what we know, even when it’s harmful. Play the ‘What If’ game—but with a twist. Instead of imagining the worst, ask yourself, “What if the best possible outcome happens instead?” What if letting go of a job you hate leads to finding your dream career? What if ending a toxic relationship makes room for true love? By focusing on positive possibilities, you can reduce the fear that holds you back.
Try this: Pick one of these strategies to experiment with this week. What effect does it have on your ability to let go?
Making Letting Go a Lifelong Practice
Letting go isn’t a one-time event; it’s a lifelong practice. Life is constantly changing, throwing new challenges and opportunities our way. So how do we keep letting go, day after day?
Daily Check-Ins: Make it a habit to ask yourself each morning, “What am I holding onto today that’s not serving me?” It could be a small annoyance, a fear, or something bigger like resentment. Identifying these things helps you prevent emotional clutter from building up, just like brushing your teeth keeps plaque at bay.
Letting Go in Real-Time: When you face a stressful situation, try letting go in real-time. Take a deep breath, acknowledge how you feel, and ask yourself, “Is this worth holding onto?” Letting go in the moment can prevent the emotional baggage from piling up over time.
Resilience through Release: The more you practice letting go, the more resilient you become. You learn that you can handle life’s challenges without being weighed down by them. Life is like a flowing river—if you cling to every rock, you’ll feel stuck. But when you let go, you become fluid and adaptable, able to move with life’s current instead of fighting it.
Try this: For one week, check in with yourself daily and practise letting go in real-time. Keep a journal of how this practice affects your mood, relationships, and overall outlook.
The Invitation to Coaching
Letting go is transformative, but it’s not always easy to do on your own. If you find yourself stuck or unsure of where to start, coaching can provide the support you need. As a mental health coach, I’ve helped countless people navigate the process of letting go and create the space for new possibilities in their lives. If you’re ready to lighten your emotional load and experience the freedom that comes with letting go, reach out to me for a session.
Together, we can identify what’s weighing you down and work on strategies to release it—so you can move forward with clarity, resilience, and peace.
Letting go is more than an act; it’s a practice. And the more you do it, the more you’ll find space to breathe, grow, and live fully.
So, what are you holding onto?
And more importantly, are you ready to let it go?
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