Authenticity Is Evolving: Rethinking What It Means to ‘Be Yourself’

by George Wilse
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What if “being yourself” isn’t the highest form of leadership?
It’s a popular phrase “Just be authentic” but when held too tightly, it can actually hold leaders back.

Authenticity Is Not a Fixed Trait

The version of you that was once authentic may no longer fit the role you’re in or the responsibilities you now carry. Leadership requires growth — and that means your sense of self must be allowed to change.
Go back far enough in your own social media posts, emails, or journal entries, and you’ll likely cringe at some version of your “authentic self.” That’s not a problem — it’s evidence of growth. If you haven’t evolved, you’re not leading — you’re repeating.

Authenticity Can Be a Smokescreen

There’s a dangerous phrase that shows up a lot in coaching conversations:

“That’s just the way I am.”
It sounds harmless. Honest, even. But what often sits underneath is fear — of being judged, of failing at a new behavior, of not being good enough. Framing resistance as authenticity can be a subtle way of protecting the ego.

The hard truth? Growth doesn’t always feel authentic at first. In fact, it often feels uncomfortable.

Calibration Over Constancy

Strong leaders don’t cling to an idealised version of themselves — they calibrate.
That means learning to notice when “being yourself” is helping, and when it’s not.
It’s not about pretending. It’s about choosing.

Some behaviors that feel most natural — like interrupting, avoiding conflict, or overexplaining — might actually be holdovers from an earlier stage of leadership. And it’s worth asking: Is this truly me? Or is it just familiar?

Start With Small Experiments

You don’t need to change everything at once. In fact, you shouldn’t.
A more useful mindset: “Let me test what happens if I…”

Try changing your tone in one conversation. Delay giving your opinion in one meeting. Let someone else lead a project while you support in a different way.

When you treat change like a live experiment rather than a final decision, growth becomes easier and less threatening to your identity.

Spot the Signals

Watch for phrases like:
“Yeah, but that’s always worked for me.”
“That’s just how I show up.”
“I’d feel fake if I did that.”
These can be honest reflections or subtle defense mechanisms.
Either way, they’re worth exploring. Leadership isn’t about staying comfortable in your identity. It’s about becoming someone who serves others more effectively over time.

True authenticity isn’t static. It’s something you grow into.
The leaders who thrive aren’t the ones who hold tightly to who they were, they’re the ones who are willing to update who they’re becoming.