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3 ESSENTIAL WAYS TO SPOT AND DEAL WITH A SELF-OPINIONATED PERSON.

Coach Marika Carrone by Marika Carrone
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I am fed up with them!! Grrrr…
Oops! Did I say it out of loud?? LOL
So, why am I getting ballistic?- Since I learnt the word “ballistic” I do really enjoy using it -Anyway, it is not our topic here.
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Who are self-opinionated people? I like to call them “The Opinionators”, that is the obsolete term to describe them.
The self-opinionated people are those ones who feel so entitled to express their opinion about you
and your life, without feeling any empathy.
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When I say “express their opinion” I am too kind. I don’t see anything wrong to express your own
opinion. What makes me “ballistic” (=mad) is that those people like to assume that their opinion is the Law of the Universe. And they try and try, repeat and repeat, their thoughts until they are satisfied. Hence, until they are sure, they could convince you, somehow.
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How to spot a self-opinionated person:
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1. If they start their sentence with “You must… You don't really want to do this and that… etc.”. Basically, their opinion is far away from being a pure opinion, and it is already a command. Wow!
And they have not started to talk, yet!! LOL Be aware of the tone of voice, it is the key. Does it sound like “I am right, you are wrong, just do it the way I say it and we will be okay!”.
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2. After they say what they think they are expecting that you agree with them. If you think you have another choice, I am afraid to say that agreeing with them is the only way to end the conversation with them and move on. Be confident with yourself and, at the same time, take just the information you think are okay for you. Even The Opinionators might have something useful to say. But, if you want a free conversation with them - Sorry, darling ?! They are not there to listen to you and what you think and blablabla, they just want you to agree with them. And that’s it.

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3. You think that if you spend more time explaining to them about what you really want or think, they will understand your reasons and your thinking process and, maybe, they will understand more about you. Hmmm yeah… sure! I am not saying that it does not work at all, I am inviting you to try it, and it might work and it might not. Depends on the person you are talking to and if this person is willing to listen. But, if this person is a Real Opinionator, sorry – you are wasting your time.
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We will always meet The Opinionators in our life. It is essential to learn how to spot them and try not to waste our time getting angry with them or trying to be full of hopes that “one day” they will listen to you.
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Put down the expectations and just take it as it is. Trying to change the self-opinionated people is not something we should focus, our mission is not to change them. But to offer them an alternative of a different way to do things. Choose to be assertive, instead of playing a conflict game with them. It doesn't worth it ;)
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Be aware who are the Opinionators in your life. And, Just learn how to: - Recognise them - Deal with them

You will be fine :) With Love,
Marika


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