So you find yourself feeling like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. You’re in your mid twenties to your early thirties and NOTHING seems to excite you any more like it did before. Remember when you used to love rolling into the office in the morning, thinking “Yeah! I’ve got this! Let’s make things happen!”. And when you used to plan how your life would look like in 5 years’ time with all the interesting work, wealth, abundance and wonderful relationships lined up. And so you get down to making it happen. And you’re hard at work. And it’s not quite there. And more time goes by – and it’s still not quite there. And so you think to yourself – it’s okay, I’ll ride it out. And then 4 years go by and you’re exhausted. And it feels bad. Work isn’t exciting. You’re not feeling motivated. Money isn’t quite there. And you’re just not very happy.
You look back and think – “Why am I unhappy? I had it all mapped out perfectly in my mind. Where did it all go wrong?”
And the answer is – it didn’t. It went right. Welcome to your very own quarter life crisis. And it is the best possible thing that could have happened to you. Why is that? You’re growing into a new person. And you’re allowing yourself to become aware of your needs that aren’t currently being met. And this is exactly what these ecky feelings are about.
Is it normal that you feel unmotivated at work and can’t get excited? Yes. It is your body telling you that your old why’s and drivers disintegrated and your soul is craving for new ones, aligned with your new sense of self. It’s a sign that you’ve outgrown your old belief systems, potentially imposed on you by parents/school/society/ insert as appropriate.
If previously you felt like you needed to boost your ego with a very cool job, now you begin to crave meaning and so the old reality becomes obsolete.
If previously money seemed like the only thing that can get you liked by people and can fill the void of insecurity, now it’s no longer the case and you ask yourself a question – what is the point in this work that I’m doing? How can I find meaning in my work and earn good money enough for high quality of life?
So a quarter life crisis is actually the best thing to happen to you. While it may be painful in the moment it for sure opens you to a new level of awareness and gives you potential for reaching a new level of joy. So it’s fantastic that you have all these questions running through your mind.
Do you feel unhappy with your work? Have you lost meaning? Wonderful – you’ve outgrown the old and are ready for new. Now, the most important thing is the mindset. It is very easy to get stuck in the negatives and become afraid of these states of being. Key to getting to the next level of your personal happiness here is to actually allow and embrace these feelings – instead of saying “oh no, why are you here again?? I just want to be happy again, just as I was before!” – tell yourself “Wonderful, these old meanings have fallen away. What is my new meaning? What kind of person do I want to be?”
This is a key first step – making this mindset shift from dread to excitement of what’s to come. And if you set an intention of looking around yourself every day open to new ideas – you’d be amazed on how quickly new opportunities will start entering into your reality. More on the exciting topic of quarter life crisis to follow shortly.